CREED OF GREED

Religion is sanctimonious selfishness.

TATTOO BLUE

An old tattoo is a permanent designer bruise.

HETEROSEXUAL CASTIGATED BY HOMOSEXUALS

Today, a heterosexual Californian was vociferously condemned by homosexuals around the world for using the word gay to describe one simply full of joy, for admiring a rainbow as merely a beautiful phenomenon of nature, for wearing a purple item of clothing to work, and for giving a same-gender friend an affectionate bear hug without signifying overt homosexual behavior.

NO GOD

Chance, choice, and change control the universe.

WILD ANIMALS

We are born wild animals that can be made sinners or saints.

DONKEYS

In fairness to political right-wingers we should keep in mind that Democrats are simply Republicans disguised in the costume of an ass.

CLUB EVIL

Today I tried to join the wildly popular international organization known as Club Evil, but the membership committee denied me because of a surplus of members and a hint of goodness left in my nature.

THE FIRST OF SPRING

Happy true new year!

SPOILED MILK

The milk of human kindness has gone sour.

A QUESTION OF HYPOCRISY

How many people protesting to stop environmental pollution and climate change drive their gasoline-guzzling SUVs to the protest site?

GOP

Lest we forget, the acronym GOP actually means Gang of Plutocrats.

RENAMING THANKSGIVING

One of the first acts of the new U.S. Congress is to change the name of Thanksgiving to Takesgiving.

THE RIGHT TO BEAR ARMS

Watch my satire on the 2nd Amendment to the U.S. Constitution on YouTube.

NEXT NOBEL PEACE PRIZE

An inside source on the Norwegian committee for the Nobel peace prize revealed that the famous organization has secretly determined the next recipient of the coveted award to be the devil.

MANDATORY MARRIAGE

Taking political correctness to new heights as the priority of its annual agenda, the Supreme Court unanimously declared that all persons must by law engage in at least one homosexual marriage in their lives.

TORTURE

If we allow cruelty to living things, we are accepting the devils of our worse nature.

70

As I enter the decade of death

and plan for endless dreamless sleep

certain as Earth turning from light to night

I recall the spiritual seasons of my life:

hope exploding from an atmospheric prism

joy blazing through the gold lens of a star

adventure adrift with leaves on the wind

crystallized languor frozen in place

despite flickering memoirs of bliss

like sparkling sunshine through breaks

in a cloud-crowded sky of indigo blue

my mind rewinds moments of pain

as if highlights from a constant cinema

featuring every being I have known

in need, love, abuse, joy, and sorrow--

tragicomedy worthy of a reckless writer

aware now of each heartbeat

and wondering which will be my last

I mourn the loss of life in brain and brawn

but mostly bemoan what might have been

had I the prudence to expect events

occurring around the next twist or turn

events that make all the difference

for that extraordinary chance to exist

but regret is a poison potion

that lowers the view below the horizon

and prevents a vision of goodness

a revelation too often lost in fancy

for I must know that as a mere man

I can no more change my story

than stop the stretch of shadows

draping the angles off a redwood tree

and my meager human existence

for all its erratic blinking in the dark

is meaningless in the cosmoscape

but for any benefit I have bestowed

for the good of other living things--

fellow mortals who dwelt with me

on this grand sphere for blips in time

and finally disappeared in the dust

Poem by Jack Forge.  Read Jack's other writing and connect with him at Smashwords.

A ROMNEY

A new common noun has been introduced into the English language.  The word is romney, that is, the belief in a thing as a benefit when actually a detriment.  For example, believing a person provides employment despite the fact that the person eliminates jobs is a romney.   The word obama was considered for the honor but the origins of the two terms indicate slightly less pretension in the latter.  Some synonyms for a romney include self-delusion, pipe-dream, and cloud-cuckoo-land.

GUNS FOR KIDS

Due to the constant threat of some crazy person walking into an educational institutional and spraying students, faculty, maintenance workers, and administrators with bullets, several states have established laws to allow children from preschool to grade twelve to pack firearms.  Since three-year old children find toting handguns unwieldy for their weak, little hands, weapons manufactures have invented small guns that look like toys but shoot deadly ammunition.  Passionate advocates of the Second Amendment to the U.S. Constitution commend the new laws as providing more people with the equal opportunity to kill each other regardless of age.

POLITICAL CONVENTIONS

Conventions are events where political puppets excrete verbal bullshit, illuminated by mass media, and swallowed whole by mindless fanatics.