A ROMNEY

A new common noun has been introduced into the English language.  The word is romney, that is, the belief in a thing as a benefit when actually a detriment.  For example, believing a person provides employment despite the fact that the person eliminates jobs is a romney.   The word obama was considered for the honor but the origins of the two terms indicate slightly less pretension in the latter.  Some synonyms for a romney include self-delusion, pipe-dream, and cloud-cuckoo-land.

GUNS FOR KIDS

Due to the constant threat of some crazy person walking into an educational institutional and spraying students, faculty, maintenance workers, and administrators with bullets, several states have established laws to allow children from preschool to grade twelve to pack firearms.  Since three-year old children find toting handguns unwieldy for their weak, little hands, weapons manufactures have invented small guns that look like toys but shoot deadly ammunition.  Passionate advocates of the Second Amendment to the U.S. Constitution commend the new laws as providing more people with the equal opportunity to kill each other regardless of age.